Worshiping together?

In our church, the kids are not only allowed to come to "big church" from the time they are born, once they hit kindergarten, they have to come to big church.

I remember when we were visiting, in the midst of all of my complaints about having to attend this church was the fact that my kindergarten and up kids would be joining me in big church. I so very wisely and kindly commented to my friend as we discussed this, "I don't like that..." 

You see, as a round-the-clock homeschool mom, I had dreams of sitting in a seat amongst other adults with my husband, dressed not in sweat shorts and a tee and cute shoes (most important) with hair and makeup done, devoting all my brain cells to the sermon being taught. 

When I heard that the kids came to church, all that came to a mental screeching halt. 

Oh, great...

And even though the baby was only 18 months old at the time, the thought of that one being in big church with us was enough to fill me with waves of fear and trepidation. 

Of course, we joined the church, because that's what happens when I stomp my foot and tell God what I will and won't do. I also began to see that along with all of my other silly notions about why this church wasn't for me, I was wrong about the kids not being in church with us. There were plenty of beneficial reasons why they should be.

But sure. The older two were the easy ones. Well, at lease when it came to church behavior.  

I was still trying not to think about the baby kid. 

The time was now quickly approaching. It was nearly here. He had to come to church with us.

Unfortunately one of the few only other times he had been to big church was Christmas Eve, which is a fraction of our usual hour and a half long service. So imagine his surprise when, two weeks ago, we attended the first real worship service as a family. He wanted to sit on the front row, and so kindly reminded me that when we attended the Easter service, and he had wanted to sit on the front row, I had dismissed him with a, "not this time, but next time..."

It was now the "next time." 

Have I mentioned the kid has a memory like a steel trap?

Hubs and the girl kid kindly refused to join us on the front row, and instead chose to sit a couple of rows back in our usual spot with Mimi.

So there we were. 

He did fine, until about 20 minutes into the sermon. 

"IS IT DONE YET?" he staged whispered to me.

"No. Shhhh," I whispered back. 

He eyed me suspiciously. I knew this was about to all go down hill.

He waited 5 more minutes and stage whispered, "IS HE ALMOST DONE?"

Did I mention we were sitting on the front row?

It wasn't pretty. 

Thankfully we made it through the service (barely) and in midst of my seething fury, the Holy Spirit stage whispered to me, "WELL, YOU REALLY DIDN'T GET HIM READY FOR THIS..."

I crumpled inside, realized I had failed my kid parentally yet again.

Of course I had packed him a Bible, his notebook, a pen and a few markers, but I hadn't taken the time to explain to him anything or tell him anything about the service or the reason we go or what we were doing or what other around us were doing or anything.

Remind me again why we don't need a license to get a kid? 

We came home, and I swam out of my guilt long enough to go search through my bookshelf for a book that our kind children's minister at our last church recommended to me. It was dusty, and as I held it in my hand, I felt such sorrow in how I had failed my kid. I was too busy and too preoccupied with myself and my own worship experience to prepare my kid for worship.

Not to mention I never really prepared the other two. I just always took advantage of their usual good church behavior. 

*sigh*

So I opened this book and was flooded with all that I should have done.

Ah, but there is parenting grace. Tons of it. Thankfully. Thank you, Lord.

As I dove into the book, I was thankful that at least I picked it up at this point instead of like... never. 

So here it is:

Parenting in the Pew - Guiding Your Children to Worship

I really think this book should be required reading for all parents who take their kids to church. It's really blowing me away. I have laughed, cried, been hugely convicted and thanked the Lord for it. 

Then today, lo and behold, I was doing some quick reading before starting dinner, and this popped up:

Worship Together

Big Church for Small Kids 

The blog posts and the book don't line up perfectly, but they do make a lot of the same points.

And of course I geek out when something I'm doing on my own gets reinforced with something online. It's just sweet confirmation from a kind God who never ceases to show me that He wants to be involved with everything we struggle with. I forget to take seemingly small things to Him, but I feel the tug of Him saying, "Bring it all to me. Nothing is too small. Nothing..."

And quite honestly how huge is how I lead my children in WORSHIP before a living, Holy, wild, untamed, yet compassionate and tender God?

Why did I let this be an issue of behavior and not see it for what it really is?

Oh me. I'm so very thankful for these kids the Lord has entrusted me with. Their patience with me is an inspiration.

I'm begging the Lord to stage whisper to me before I make a huge blunder like this next time. He'll do that, you know...