Mary wore Baby Jesus in a SLING!

I don't feel quite so weird now! ;)

Stick a fork in me

I'm done! I love Christmas, in all it's merriment and festivities. Then BAM, as soon as it's the 26th, I'm ready to pack the stuff up and get back to normal. It only came to my attention a short time ago that some people actually get blue about Christmas' passing. Nothing against those people, but I sure ain't one of them. I want my house back. I want to walk through my living room and not trip over something Christmas related. I'm ready to not be crazy busy and worn out.

Allen likes to leave the tree up until New Year's Eve, and I'm good with that. I'm puttering around, trying to get the house back in semi-order before we drag the 100 boxes out of the attic and put everything away. New Year's Day, I'm all over it. January 2, I want a normal house!!! There was a lady in my old neighborhood who left her tree up until February. I don't get that. That's true Christmas love!

I'm a little sad about the way our Christmas turned out, only because of my illness! I managed to stay in the recliner all day, on Christmas Day, and at least be in the same room with everyone. Allen was so amazing. He cooked all day, doing breakfast, lunch and most of my Christmas dinner. He was up until 2, wrapping on Christmas Eve, since I couldn't help at all. He cleaned the house 12 times. I was so thankful and proud of him. I hated it, since he had such a crazy December, then spent a week terribly sick too.

But the kids had a great day anyway, and I had to keep reminding myself that Christmas is the whole season, and not just a couple of days at the end. So bear with me, as I bullet some of the fun we had for the scrap pages I'll do in 5 years.

-our fun day of breakfast shopping, the Helena Christmas parade, and buying our tree
-the living nativity
-Laney's and my day of grown up coffee and hot chocolate drinking Galleria shopping and a movie with Mimi and Abigail
-my late nights of drinking hot chocolate, watching movies like "Miss Potter" while working on my 7 homemade calendar Christmas presents
-watching "Pirates 3" with Allen
-baking and wrapping presents with the kids

-eating pizza by candlelight when the power was off

-Allen and the kids laying in the bed watching "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas"

Ah, it was fun and wonderful. I am so glad we had a great Christmas, and now I'm ready for a happy New Year!!!!!

If you have an hour or two to waste, here is our Christmas album:

http://picasaweb.google.com/aljzloveme/Christmas2007

This picture says it all:

Christmas is Magical

I'm not sure if that's the correct word exactly, but I love that special, sparkly feeling that Christmas brings. The anticipation, the warmth, the love. Even sitting in Christmas traffic you feel the bustle of Christmas and it feels different than the usual bustle.

Even non believers feel it, for the most part. It's weird. There are song about it. People talk about it. The special, magical feeling of Christmas.

I think that's Jesus. The essence of Him, in our everyday lives more so than other times of the year. A tangible feeling of Him in all the places we go. I feel Him in the glow of the Christmas tree lights. I see Him in the excitement of my children's' faces. I hear him in the songs that the whole world seems to be singing.

I love that the whole world seems to be celebrating Him, even though they don't know it. It gives me a glimpse of Heaven, and a place where everything IS Him. Won't that be cool???

All is calm, all is quiet

It was difficult to decorate for the holidays this year. Lots to do, not much time to do it all. I didn't get to do as much as I normally do, but maybe I'll get to do bits and pieces more.

Our tree is really great, though. I love it. Every year I think I might be tired of the blue and silver, but it's so magical, and I'm glad we do it again each year. It's all about snowmen, I think because we never get any snow!!!

I got some other great old timey decorations last year, and they are really sweet. I love to mix and match decorations. I'll post pics of them later. I love how the house looks all decorated. So cozy and wonderful. Allen has worked so hard on the outside, too. I'll post pics of that later too!

Homemade chocolate chip cookies and my People magazine are waiting for me!!!

I get hung up on Christmas

I was putting up my beloved nativity that my grandmother gave me the first year I was married when the thoughts stirred up in me again. I love the nativity, because I love her, but there are several things that really bug me about this nativity. All the participants are lily white. Caucasian as they come. I think Joseph even has strawberry blond hair. 

And there are wise men. I scoot them waaaay down the mantle, to make them look far away. They are white too, and there are 3 of them. We don't know how many there were and they didn't get there until Jesus was about 2. They can't help it, but those wise men bother me.

Jesus wasn't born in December, and I promise you, if Allen hears me talk about this one more time, we will be on the news. First manslaughter caused by the discussion of the birth of Baby Jesus.

But since this is my blog, I'll say it again. He was most likely born in September. Some pinpoint the day as September 11th, which is kinda creepy to me. But anyway, let's not go there. And that may not be right anyway. But the point is, He was definitely not born in December. 

Jesus told us to celebrate His death, but never mentioned His birth. It makes me so sad for Him, that we don't even celebrate His birth on the right day when I'm not sure He ever intended for us to celebrate it to begin with. And we mix it up with all this shopping, stress and choas. I've heard so many people, including myself, say "'tis the season" when it comes to being stressed. *sigh*



I keep a little nativity on my window sill in the kitchen, and I thank God for sending His son almost every day. I try to every day, but I fail miserably. So it's not that I don't want to thank God for His son, but this whole Christmas thing bothers me a tad.

My "weird" friend, who shall remain nameless, doesn't celebrate Jesus's birth at Christmas. Neither does her church. They celebrate the birth all year long, and Christmas is Santa, food, family, fun and fellowship.



I sort of like that.

Do you know what would happen if we shunned the whole "Jesus is the Reason" mindset? My family is already terribly weird because we don't pretend Santa is real. We pretend that he's pretend. Oh, people get upset at that one. I'd hate to add, "We don't celebrate Jesus either." It'd be ugly.

Allen is not this weird. I promise you. He rolls his eyes, and tries really hard to understand why I struggle with this so much. And I guess I just needed to say it again, this year. It's like part of my Christmas tradition. You know, like, put up the tree, decorate, shop and whine about Christmas.

Okay, this guy understands me a bit:

"A little humility is a very good thing when we're about the business of interpreting Scripture. We need to recognize that Scripture doesn't tell us everything we might be curious about, and so there are things that we simply can't know for sure. One thing we can be reasonably sure of, though, is that if the Bible doesn't give us full information on something, it probably isn't crucial for us to know it. If we're getting stymied in trying to figure out something, we're probably heading off on a rabbit trail, and missing the main point of what the author wanted us to see. It might be a good idea, this Christmas season, to forget about what we know of the whole Christmas story, and to read the individual Christmas stories once again, and see the different angles that the Holy Spirit inspired Matthew and Luke to tell us about. Come to think of it, it might not be a bad thing to blog on...."
(Link)

I need to take his words to heart, and listen to what the Spirit tells me about Christmas. I'm telling ya, It won't let this go with me. I must spout off each year about what I don't like about Christmas. I wish the Scripture was more clear, but I know it's not because of people like me. No amount of information will ever be enough.

Don't worry - my kids have a great holiday. I haven't poisoned their minds yet. Although I do make them say, "This is when we CELEBRATE Jesus' birth" instead of "This is when Jesus was born." I know-horrible. I'll make it up by buying them tons of commerically produced and mass marketed gifts... :)

We three kings of Orient are

Bearing gifts, we traverse afar

Field and fountain, moor and mountain

Following yonder star....

What do I want in a church?

I want a church that shows me how to look and act like Christ. That's all. Maybe it's my fault that I think that's hard to find. Maybe I'm simply the problem.

Maybe our modern churches are just a product of society. Maybe we have to have politics and issues because of the mess we've made of the world. Maybe messed up churches are just a symptom of a messed up world. So where do we go, that's not messed up? Or are we always going to mess it up???

I know that sin makes things not good. I know we aren't going to have perfection on this earth because of sin. I know that nothing is going to be pure and good on this earth, until the new earth comes. I refuse to believe, though, that we can't have a Godly church. I refuse to believe that because we are all sinners that our churches have to be full of sin.

Maybe I am naive. Maybe I'm simplistic. Maybe, and probably, I have absolutely no idea of what I'm speaking. I just want a church full of people that have no interests other than being so very radically and passionately different from the rest of the world. That's who I want to be.

I don't want potlucks. I don't want committees. I don't want to have to wonder what my preacher is making, and whether or not my offering needs to go to the church or my needy neighbor. I don't want to have to go to business meetings or a committee meeting to decide what color the front door needs to be.

My heart is sad. Not because I don't think the church I desire exists, but because I don't know how to find it, and I don't know if I can honestly be a part of it without being part of the problem.

The Long Goodbye

We were out in Center Point today, visiting Allen's stepmother's store. When we were done, instead of coming home to do school, the Spirit urged me towards my grandparent's house. I didn't really want to go. We are behind in school because of Thanksgiving, but I knew this was important. So we went.

My grandparents have been suffering from dementia for years. My grandmother has Alzheimer's, actually, and I wonder if my grandfather has it too.

They've been getting progressively worse for years, but I don't think you're ever ready for this day.

My grandmother did not know who I was.

I cried, after we left. They loved the kids, and the sitter asked us to come back more often. They live in Clay, which is an exit past the Trussville one on 459. As much as Zane hates the car seat, the trip doesn't get made often enough.

It's hard too. I love my Mama Sue in a special way, I guess pretty much the way everyone loves their grandmother. But she and I have always had a special bond. Laney is even named after her. She was a fashionista, as you can tell by her rockin' green hat, and my love is evident for her even as a 2 month old. I love that picture of me gazing up at her. I wore her dress when Allen and I married, and she was so proud. She helped me get into, and out of, it that day. She was so happy.

She's been gone for a long time now. The lady I used to call and ask cooking or sewing questions to. She raised 3 kids. A blond eldest daughter who danced and sang her way through life. A quiet, sweet, gentle middle boy, who never wanted to rock the boat. And a youngest son who was a giant, loud soul, but was affectionate and fiercely loyal and protective. Isn't that something?

They used to only be able to remember long ago facts, which was fine with me. We'd talk about family and friends of long ago, laughing over stories and memories. Today Sue only remembered having male children, and they couldn't remember what of our family were alive or dead. My Daddy lives on 60 acres somewhere, in Buddy's mind, and "people" keep stealing Daddy Buddy's garbage can. But Buddy could still remember and talk about Bobby Bowden, who was a childhood best friend. I always get sad now, when I see Coach Bowden, knowing my granddaddy and he are the same age. And how different they are at this stage of life.

Buddy hasn't lost his sense of humor though. We were going down the stairs, so he could show me the room he's "been working on" and he paused to pick up a bag of garbage. I said, "Let me get that, Buddy." He said, "Nah, I'll get it. I'm the garbage man around here. you know." I laughed and said, "How'd you get that job?" He said, "I had to work hard for a long time to get it, and I'll tell you what. The pay stinks!" He had the old twinkle in his eye for just a second. Then it was gone.

Laney asked in the car why he didn't make much sense when he talked. It was hard to explain that his brain was broken.

I cried, thinking that Laney, and the boys, will never know the grandparents I had. The ones who would swing with me on the porch swing for hours. The ones who made me ice cream with chocolate sauce, took me shopping and let us spend the night whenever I wanted. The ones who I spent the night with before Thanksgiving and helped get ready for the big day. Sue was an amazing cook, and could sew better than anyone you've met. She made my costume for show choir in college, and it looked like a professional made it. She made me feel so incredibly loved all the time. We went to the lake house, and would sit and talk for days. Buddy would clean my shoes and tell me how to fix things. When a boy broke my heart, he said there were other fish in the sea. When I got married, they told us to only fight when we were naked. (We've never done that, by the way...) They've been married 56 years.

I usually curl up beside her on the couch and snuggle, but today, she was distant and a tad uncomfortable, like when a stranger sits too close in a movie or at church. I scooted over to give her more room and make her feel better. I realize how selfish I sound. Can you imagine living in a healthy body, but having no mind? I tried today.

What it boils down to is that I don't want to live a day where I can't talk to and praise Jesus. I want to keep my mind. I don't want my children to know the heartbreak of my not knowing them. That would just kill me. So I asked God to protect my mind. Seal it against decay, and keep me focused on Him till the day I die.

Nancy Regan called Alzheimer's "the long goodbye." She was right. Today was another chapter in this long season of my grandparent's life. I'm still trying to absorb it, and figure out how God wants me to process it all. I rambled, and thanks for being there to read it.

So what do you do all day?

Someone actually said that to me the other day. I was a little stunned, and if you can believe it, speechless. What do I do all day? Well, let's see.

I woke up at 6:45 this morning, and stumbled downstairs. I sat in the recliner for 15 minutes, attempting to wake up, snuggling with the kids, and tried to read the newscasters' lips on television. (I have loud children.) Then I got up and put a load of laundry in the wash, and started cooking breakfast while unloading and loading the dishwasher. Then I cleaned the counter and sinks, cabinet fronts and tried to hit the dust boards that were caked with dirt. Yes, I am a great housekeeper, evidently, from all the dirt in my kitchen. So we eat breakfast, and I get to clean the kitchen again. More laundry goes into the wash, and we all head upstairs to get ready. I dress Zane, help Jude find clothes, make beds, and sorta get ready myself. (Getting ready most days is throwing on clothes and brushing my teeth. I actually wore my face washing head band today. All day. *sigh*)

So after 10 frantic phone calls, and a few small disasters, more laundry, and a quick pick up of my room, we head to Target to get a birthday present. This sounds relatively easy, but Zane's sole purpose in life right now is to make every single task as difficult as possible. We managed to make it through the checkout line, and I decided to reward myself with some coffee from Starbucks. I'm not a big coffee drinker, and even less of a Starbucks fan, but I had worked hard already by that point, right? I had talked to Jenn on the way there, and she told me exactly what to order. Well, all that important info got shaken loose as I chased Zane through Target (yes, I took him out of the buggy. He had gotten out of the seat belt and was STANDING UP in the buggy. *sigh*) So I stood at the Starbucks counter and looked up at the big sign. It was all Greek to me. I saw the word "Chocolate" and "Creme" and thought, "Okay, I think I can handle that." I was shocked and disgusted and thoroughly pleased when the girl handed me a giant frozen drink topped with tons of whipped cream and chocolate sauce. I'm totally sure it was at lease 5,000 calories.

Off the go to the car we go, me with my butt extender of a drink, and Jude and Laney with their hot chocolate. I had wrestled Zane back into the buggy, and he was screaming for Jude's hot chocolate. I was pushing the buggy with one hand, and had my "coffee" in the other hand when Jude decided he didn't like his hot chocolate anymore, and in fact it was much too hot to even hold for another millisecond. So now I'm driving the buggy with my "coffee," Jude's hot chocolate and Zane, who can now REACH the so desired hot chocolate. I stop, the total of 5 feet we've managed to make it out of the store, and give him some hot chocolate. It goes all down his face, inside and outside of his outfit and me. I yelled for Jude to hold his own freaking hot chocolate ) a purchase I am SO regreting now) and we make it FINALLY to the van. I load the van, and get the kids strapped in, all to the tune of "MOM CAN WE GO TO CHICK FIL A?????" I was weak. I said yes. Ugh. SO not in the budget this week.

So we go through the Chick, and finally get home. Once home, I decide I can't stand the nastiness of our van anymore, and we all clean out the van. I realize why I can't ever find any sippy cups. There were 7 in our van. Tons of trash. Ugh. So after cleaning it out, I vacuumed it. Okay fine. I pulled it into the garage, opened the doors, and let the dog eat all the food that was on the floor. It was all organic food. She'll be fine. She did a good job too. On second thought, maybe she should sleep in the back yard instead of the garage tonight, just in case...

So once inside, I sent the kids out to play while I finished packing up the Thanksgiving decorations. Our neighbors already have out their Christmas stuff, so I was feeling a little pressure. More laundry too.

Then we do 3 hours of homeschooling. And refereeing. And laundry. Ugh.

After school, the kids went out to play, and I moved the bookcase in our living room. That involved taking everything off of it, moving it and putting everything back. At least I got to talk to Hayes while I was working. There was dog poop on three pairs of shoes, a lost monster truck and several teary "He ____ me."

"Well, she ____ me....." At least the books were all back on the shelf.

We headed upstairs to clean bedrooms to get ready for Bible study. Both of the kids' rooms looked like tornado disaster areas. Got those cleaned up and put the kids in the bath. I showered myself, in the same bathroom for safety, and then put up some clean laundry while they finished playing in the bath. Then I bathed everyone, got everyone out and put pj's on the boys.

We went downstairs where I put on "Finding Nemo," we're studying fish in school (LOL) and started cooking dinner. And do more laundry.

We ate dinner, and I cleaned up the kitchen again. Then it's brush teeth, get into bed, get Zane down and do my Bible study and fold 10 loads of laundry.

Blech. So what do I do every day? That.

I guess if this weren't a normal day, or if I knew tomorrow would be different, it would be better. But it's always the same. I don't even have time to PLAY with my kids. I know things get better when they get bigger, I hope, but I just... I don't' know.

So last night, I studied this verse:

Mark 8:34 (Amplified Bible)

34 And Jesus called [to Him] the throng with His disciples and said to them, If anyone intends to come after Me, let him deny himself [forget, ignore, disown, and lose sight of himself and his own interests] and take up his cross, and joining Me as a disciple and siding with My party] follow with Me [continually, cleaving steadfastly to Me].

Did you see all that? Wow. It's not about me. It's about Him. He knows how busy I am. He knows how tired I am. But all that matters is that I seek Him. Nothing else really matters. He takes care of me, gives me strength, patience, and hope. (!) I want and need to squash that little voice that keeps whining, "What about me?" This is my job. I'm lucky to be able to do this. I have 3 amazing blessings. It's not about what I want out of life right now. It's about being the wife, mother and child of God that He's called me to be. I'm going to do my job well, because that glorifies Him. And I'm not going to whine about it.

So what do I do all day? I steadfastly cleave to Him. That sounds better.

Laney's window got bigger!

Thanksgiving night, after her party, Grandmother touched her tooth, and it literally fell out of her mouth. Laney burst into tears, with relief and excitement. That darn tooth had been giving her trouble for at least a week. She put the tooth under her pillow, and the tooth fairy brought her a sweet present. We're glad that's over!

She looks adorable. She talks with the most precious lisp now! We make her say words over and over, and she sweetly indulges us! I told her that her cute quota went up a couple of notches. We didn't even think that was possible!!!! Yea, Laney! And hopefully the rest of those teeth will stay put for a while. We need a break!

The Bee Movie

The final stop of the day was Bee Movie. We were all pretty excited about seeing this one.

We loaded up on popcorn and candy. We got Zane to sleep, and were ready for the show!

I wasn't expecting the movie to be educational, but evidently I was zoned out during whatever grade or grades that I learned about our friend, the bee.

The bee is not supposed to be able to fly. Its wings are not aerodynamically able to support its weight. It's shouldn't even be able to get off the ground. I'm not sure how that fact escaped me all these years, because that is pretty amazing. I think God does stuff like that to say, "See how cool I am???" So I was sitting there, pondering this neat fact, when I realized that I'm kinda like a bee. I'm not supposed to be able to soar like an eagle. I'm full of challenges that should keep me from being the person that God wants me to be (no pun intended) but He so miraculously frees me from myself and allows me to get off the ground, and fly. You know? How neat is that?

Well, bees also can't fly in the rain. I never knew that either. (See the great thing about homeschooling is that the teacher learns with the students. I've learned more this year than Laney-volcanoes, trees, flowers, planets... you name it, I've learned it. I can't wait for more. Obviously I need to relearn a BUNCH of stuff.)

I feel like I can't fly in the rain either. My goal this past New Year was to learn to live with joy and peace NO MATTER THE CIRCUMSTANCES. A lofty goal, I realize. But when the rain comes down, I tend to shut down, emotionally, spiritually and physically. Get into bed and pull the covers over my head. I have improved this year, and see where God continues that work in me. I'm glad, because I'm not there yet. I want to soar in the rain, or I'm never going to fully realize the life that Jesus died on the cross for me to have. He didn't die just so I wouldn't go to hell. Certainly that's a part of it that I'm terribly thankful for, but He came, so that I might have and ENJOY life, and have it in abundance, enjoy it to the fullest, until it overflows. (John 10:10) Not just when things are good. Not just when things are going my way. But all the time. When things are dull, routine and boring. When things are fabulous. And when it's raining really hard.

So then I started to see how else I'm like this little bee. The other thing I didn't know (I know you're shocked that there's more I didn't know) is that the Queen Bee has all the baby bees by different fathers. Weird, huh? So the only parallel I could draw there is that we're all children of the King. We all have the same Father.

Rob Bell, in Velvet Elvis, talks about how Christians can find God, and truth, in just about anything. It would take waaaaay too much time to explain the concept fully here (Just GO READ the amazing book) but I've been trying to do that. Finding inspiration, reasons to pray or praise, or find God in everything I see and do. That's my recent challenge. So it was fun to find God and truth in Bee Movie.

The kids liked it too, and fun munching the treats too. Zane woke up mid way through the movie, and, well, I wouldn't recommending going to see this movie with a 16 month old. Allen and I spent some time wandering the side aisles. But it was an okay movie. I don't endorse movies, so don't look for that here, but we had fun.

Laney's big day was over. After numerous meltdowns, we threw the kids in bed early and relaxed ourselves. Big fun. And we were a tiny bit glad that it was all over!!!

Laney's Day of Fun - Part 1

As if we could have any more fun, on Friday we started out for "Laney's Day of Birthday Fun." The Vines' family, sans Daddy James, met us at Chuck E. Cheese and the fun began.

We had a blast. The kids ran and played, and the grownups played a bit too. Mom, Aunt Jodie and Grandmama came by on their way to their fun Black Friday fun. That was sweet, and Laney was glad to see them. While she was there, I talked Mom into getting on a new game. It's simulates a roller coaster, and very well indeed. There is a huge screen that shows the ride, and these reclining chairs shake, move and vibrate! Mom did well for a moment, and then after closing her eyes for a bit, jumped off the ride mid way through. I laughed so hard, I was crying. The kids loved it too, and Jennifer was so sad that her pregnant self wasn't allowed on!

We ate pizza, and played some more. The girls danced themselves silly, the boys ran all over the place, and Zane had a big time too. Allen came by after work, and got in on the fun before we had to leave. We had more fun on the agenda, believe it or not. Whew!

Laney's birthday party

After our Thanksgiving dinner, it was party time. Laney had chosen to have a Tinkerbell birthday, and the decorations and cake were just precious. She did a great job choosing them!!!

The cake was yummy, and a perfect sweet treat for after dinner. We were sad that our 8 months pregnant, amazing, professional cake maker, Jennifer, was out of commission. I'm joking, but I've always said that she spoils us to death, and it's true! We missed her sweet treat, but are more glad that she's put that business on hold indefinitely. She needs the rest!

Laney got great presents from her sweet family. She got art supplies, which are her very favorite, from Aunt Cathy. She got a bag full of treats from Grandmother and Papa, and her favorites from them included a sparkly Hello Kitty necklace, some Princess school supplies and two inflatable chairs. Mimi got her the mermaid costume they had spied together on a shopping trip. Emily and Anna got her more art supplies, and let me tell you, she has already used them all!!! Aunt Sandy stole the show with a ballerina music box that Laney had been dreaming about for months. Her face was just priceless when she opened it up. It was a great moment! Mommy and Daddy had already gotten her the Mulan costume she wore on Halloween and her Ratatouille movie. She also had a "Birthday Day" coming on Friday that was part of her present.

To quote one of my Dad's favorite sayings, "Laney racked up"!!!! She had played with her new things, and had such a sweet time! Everyone was exhausted after all the fun, as evidenced below. Off to write thank you notes... :)

Thanksgiving!

Whew. After a week's worth of preparation, menu planning and recipe gathering, countless trips to the grocery store, rearranging-aka taking out to the garage-furniture and "essential stuff" that was in the way, cleaning, baking, driving Allen crazy, wrestling with a frozen turkey and sleepless nights thanks to Zane, Thanksgiving finally arrived. Since it was Laney's birthday, I wanted to have most of our family here this year, together. It was the first time both sides had celebrated a holiday together. Things were remarkable smooth, with only a few minor bumps. I know, without a doubt, that this was largely due to prayer, by myself and my precious friends. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

We ate ourselves silly, but it always amazes me that it takes so much time to prepare the feast, and only a few minutes to eat it. I like how they did it in Jesus' day. They sat around for hours and ate and talked. I know that made the hostess feel good!! We should do that now too...

My favorite thing about Thanksgiving is LEFTOVERS!!! Last night, Allen and I got on our jammies, and ate leftovers until we thought we would pop, and watched football. Comfortable, no stress and SO much fun!!! Not that the actually holiday isn't fun-I love it. But our after party is so great too. We love to eat leftovers all weekend, which is why we had two turkeys. One for just us for we weekend!!!

So a good time was had by all. I was sad to see it come and go, my favorite holiday. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to her for another year!!! I didn't get to watch the parade this year, with all the running around we did that morning, and that's Laney's and my favorite thing to do. But next year we'll be at my mom's sister's house, and all we have to do is bring a dish or two, and show up. As I think about it, maybe I like that kind of Thanksgiving better.... Just kidding (kinda)!!!! Hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful too. I thought about you all!

Happy Birthday, Laney

I'll have pictures later, but I didn't want her birthday to get away without me posting some thoughts. My friends have posted such eloquent tributes to their children on their birthdays, and I wanted to do the same for Laney. Honestly, I can't put into words how I feel about her. Does that make me a bad Mommy? Or a bad Blogger?? Oh well.

6 years ago, at 5:37 p.m. Laney came into the world. Today is her "real" birthday, since she was born on Thanksgiving. I love that she was born that day, because Thanksgiving has always been one my favorite holidays. It was amazing. She wasn't due for 5 more days, and Allen and I had plans, of course. We messed up everyones' Thanksgiving!! 12 people waited for her to be born for 7 hours all smushed into one tiny waiting room. It was crazy.

Allen and I had watched "Legally Blonde" and ate Papa John's the night before she was born. My last night of nothing-to-do-ness. So last night, we ordered Papa John's and were going to watch Legally Blonde, but got busy and didn't. We wanted to recreate that night before she was born. Such sweet memories.

You know, Laney saved my life. I was in a period of pretty heavy self destruction when I got pregnant with her. We weren't ready to have kids. We lived in a 700 square foot rented house in Homewood. I worked between 40 and 80 hours at my job. Allen played in a band all over the Southeast. I wasn't sure if I even wanted kids. I was 28, and really had no plans to start a family.

And there was that test. "Positive." Wow. I'll never forget that feeling. "Things are never going to be the same." And they weren't. {And then intense nausea. (!) }

I honestly don't know how many ways God had tried to get my attention before I got pregnant. Probably a lot. I'm not sure how long He was going to let me go on, being so far from Him. I'm so incredibly thankful that He allowed me to get pregnant, instead of the thousands of other ways I can think of that I would personally bring a disobedient child home. Beating me to a pulp sounds much like what I deserved.

And they way He worked out my job. I was able to ask for, and receive, a demotion (!) to reduce my responsibilities and my hours, but keep my pay. I was able to quit work at 28 weeks, and get full disability. I even got full pay 6 weeks after she was born, even though it was clear that I wasn't coming back. He provided us with a huge- to us back then- house. Everything we needed was provided with ease. Man.

That is God. No time in my life, have I ever felt His provision, His love and His grace more during those 9 months. I was so NOT deserving of any of that. I had spent 8 years, completely oblivious to God, spinning and twirling through my own narcissistic little life.

So when I look at Laney, I don't just see her. I mean, she *is* amazing. I can say that. I'm her mother. She's happy, sweet, smart, devoted, caring, loving, nurturing, determined, thorough, perceptive, gracious, polite, talented, sparkly and just anointed. But when I look at her, I am reminded that she is a gift, and God used her in a way that I can't even describe. I'm sure He would have brought me around one way or another, but He chose her. That never, ever ceases to astound me.

And I don't think she'll ever understand what she did for me. By just being born. I gotta say it again. Man. That is just the coolest thing ever.

A Thankful Week

I love the Mitford Series, by Jan Karon. They touched me far more than I expected them to. In one of them, the question was raised-"What if God took away each and every thing that you have never thanked Him for?"

I thank God a lot for the important things. Allen, our children, food, our house, Allen's job and my van. But the little things? The tiny things? Wow.

Boy, I went around and thanked God for everything I could think of. Hot water, showers and toilets, garbage men, chairs, tires, fingernail clippers... The list went on and on. It was an eye opening experience, showing me how much for granted I take most of my life.

I love the Amazing Race. I ignore, for now, some of the yucky stuff because I am able to get a glimpse of the world I so desperately want to travel someday. And it's actually improving some of my geography skills! Hee!

Last night, they were in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso in West Africa. They were in a tiny, filthy schoolroom that was leaking because it was raining. It reminded me how very wealthy we are. Incredible.

So this week, I'm going to stay in thankful mode. I usually am, I think, but I want to stay that was permanently. I'll use this week as practice.

Did you know that it is psychosomatically impossible to feel stress and be thankful at the same time?? Isn't that cool????

Colossians 2

6 As you have therefore received Christ, [even] Jesus the Lord, [so] walk (regulate your lives and conduct yourselves) in union with and conformity to Him.

7 Have the roots [of your being] firmly and deeply planted [in Him, fixed and founded in Him], being continually built up in Him, becoming increasingly more confirmed and established in the faith, just as you were taught, and abounding and overflowing in it with thanksgiving.

Colossians 3

15 And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ's] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always].

I'm going to be more thankful.

Why fall is so cool

I just love this time of year, I think mainly because evidence of God is just everywhere. Look at the sky. It's the most captivating color of blue. Look at the trees. He is so amazing. He didn't have to make fall so beautiful. He could have just made the leaves fall off and be done with it. We learned in school that the leaves fall off because their food and water supply are cut off, since the leaves couldn't survive the harsh winter anyway. It was nice to know that scientific reasoning behind the leaves falling off, but it did nothing to diminish my admiration of those gorgeous colors.

This time of year reminds me more of this passage of scripture than spring does:

24"Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap; they have no storeroom nor barn, and yet God feeds them; how much more valuable you are than the birds!

25"And which of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life's span?

26"If then you cannot do even a very little thing, why do you worry about other matters?

27"Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; but I tell you, not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these.

28"But if God so clothes the grass in the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, how much more will He clothe you? You men of little faith!

29"And do not seek what you will eat and what you will drink, and do not keep worrying.

30"For all these things the nations of the world eagerly seek; but your Father knows that you need these things.

31"But seek His kingdom, and these things will be added to you.

32Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has chosen gladly to give you the kingdom.

33Sell your possessions and give to charity; make yourselves money belts which do not wear out, an unfailing treasure in heaven, where no thief comes near nor moth destroys.

34"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Luke 12

Don't Laugh

I'm starting a "healthy" blog. Not a blog that is healthy, but rather a blog that talks about all things health wise. Sounds ridiculous, I know, but so many people ask about food and health info, and there is so much info out there, it's overwhelming. So I'm going to slowly and gently talk through some of the weird things we do. Cause there's LOTS of those!

Some info I'm not going to give out, for fear of judgment, but if you have questions I don't answer, please feel free to ask. I'll be very free one on one. I've just had some bad experiences with people being judgmental about things that really didn't have anything to do with them!!

So feel free to ignore if you want to. Or glance through or whatever. Take what you need and leave the rest. And if you have something you are wondering about-ask away....:)

Laney has a window

That's what Mrs. Shellyn calls it when you lose a top tooth or two. It was a couple of days of misery, as that old tooth kept hurting and getting in the way of eating and talking and all that important stuff. Finally, the brave girl let Daddy pull it. Whew. Much relief. Then she dressed up as the tooth fairy in anticipation of her present under her pillow!

One of those email forwards

Okay, fine. I know they are cheesy. But every now and then, one comes across that is really what I needed that day. I have been overwhelmed, oppressed, and I'll admit it, downright depressed here lately. I have been trying to figure out how to put it into words, to get it down onto "paper," hoping that cleansing myself of it all, I could somehow be rid of it all. I just couldn't figure out how to express my feelings at all, eloquently or not. I got this email sometime last week, but as behind as I was with emails, it sat in my inbox, waiting patiently. I finally read it today. Just when I really needed it the most.

A carrot, an egg, and a cup of coffee...

You will never look at a cup of coffee the same way again.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word. In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners.

She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, 'Tell me what you see.'

'Carrots, eggs, and coffee,' she replied. Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.

The daughter then asked, 'What does it mean, mother?' Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

'Which are you?' she asked her daughter. 'When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean? Think of this: Which am I?

Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level?

How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

I've been both a carrot and an egg here lately, waffling back and forth between the two-which ever one was easier at the time. My heart, which was feeling, and my head, who was knowing, were at odds with each other, each battling for control. My heart won hands down. I just let myself feel whatever I felt like feeling and that is dangerous for me. Seldom do what I feel and what I know match up. My feelings tell me things are going to always be this hard. That no one understands, or worse, don't even care. That God has simply decided that He's much too busy to help with my tiny, minute problems that are absolutely bowling me over. If I'm incapable of handling these bumps in the road, than He is going to sit by and wait until I'm mature enough to handle life, then He'll step in and help me when something big comes my way.

I really hate my feelings. Or my flesh. They are one and the same most days. They lie and make it hard to get out of bed. They make me sad, hard to live with and very blah, to say the least.

So this silly little forward reminded me that I am so very capable of being coffee. That's what God has called me to do. And Ephesians even tells me the that the power that raised Jesus from the dead is in me. I have that power. So that power can raise Jesus from the dead, but can't help my attitude have a good day? Please.

Yes, I know what to do. I know how to get out of this funk. It's just the doing part I'm having a hard time with. I'm working on it, though.

Trick or Treat, Smell my Feet

give me something good to eat.If you don't, I don't care,
I'll pull down my underwear.


Hee! Laney read this in a book, and walked around saying it for a couple of days. I think she was even kind enough to teach it to our neighbor's little girl. She did say, "Now I told Brittany that it wasn't nice to say it when you're trick or treating. You can only say it while you're at home." Oh boy.

We had a great time on Halloween night. We went to Publix, since the nice check out lady had told them to come last week when we were there, and they had NOT forgotten. Mom and I needed to go anyway, and the kids actually had a blast. They decorated cookies, played games and got great treats. Who would have thought?

We came home and ate chili, and it was time to go! Allen loaded Laney and Jude in the wagon, and off they went. Zane was fine, until they came back, to drop off some candy, and he lost it when they left. He stood at the door, crying, "La La La La La La...." Mom said she was fine to hand out candy, so I stuck Zane in the wagon, and off we all went. It was such fun! Zane loved being in the wagon, and we went all over the neighborhood. There were tons of people, and it was like a neighborhood party.

The kids soon got good and tired, so Allen carried Zane and Laney and Jude jumped in the wagon, and we all headed home. They got tons of candy, which was to cause lots of trouble later!!!! It was a great Halloween!

Faux pumpkin patch

I just couldn't get the kids to a real pumpkin patch year. Color me being overwhelmed, I guess. But today, on Halloween, we got to go to a local church where we had bought our pumpkins. The kids thought the "Pumpkin Patch" was big fun! Next year we'll go to a real one. We got some good pictures, though, and that was fun!

Fall Ball Fun!

The kids had a great time at the Fall Ball! It was a fun way to kick off Halloween week! We love this time of year, and the kids were beside themselves with excitement!! Laney is a Disney Princess, Mulan. Jude is Clifford, the Big Red Dog. Zane is Charlie Brown. (His "hat" says "Good Grief"!) The best part was seeing the kids all dressed up. They were so precious! Some of our friends had great costumes too! My kangeroo costume was much too hot to wear. Dang Alabama Halloweens. Oh well. :)

Maybe they could come every day

The gentlemen who do a fabulous job on our yard allowed Laney and me to have the quietest 30 minutes of school we've ever had. How much do you think it would cost for them to come every day???

I'm not sweating???

Why, it must be fall, finally!! YEE HOO!!! I don't much like the summer. Sure, the beach is nice, and so it the pool. Cooking out is fine, and the holidays are okay. Know what I like? COLD WEATHER!!!



Now Kathy, who last lived in Pennsylvania, tells me I don't really know what it's like to have cold weather. But I sure do love our version of it. And I'd like to sample some "real" cold one day!

So here are the reasons I LOVE cold weather:

1. I can burrow down underneath the covers.
2. I can wear jeans and pants.
3. I can be in my house and not sweat like crazy.
4. I can wear layers!
5. We can eat soup!
6. I can get chill bumps!
7. I can wear warm jammies.
8. We love to build fires, and make Smores!
9. The kids will play outside forever.
10. The kids' car seats don't "burn" them when we get in the van.
11. I can dry clothes any time of the day!
12. Same with the oven. I love to bake this time of year.
13. We can open all the curtains!
14. I can open windows!
15. I can wear my hair down.
16. We can go for walks.
17. We can go to the park.
18. The Holidays are coming!
19. The sky is so blue.
20. The kids are so adorable in their warm jammies.
21. My face isn't (as) greasy.
22. I love to breathe cold air.
23. I love frost.
24. I love how warm and cozy the house is in the winter.
25. Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas are my favorites.
26. I love the leaves changing colors.
27. I love that water from the tap is cool, and not luke warm. No need for ice now!

There are more, but you get the picture. Thank you, Lord, for fall (and winter)!!!!!

Zane's new tricks

He can eat with a spoon. I won't comment on the mess. Just that he can!

He can also ride Laney's "bike." Hilarious. And precious!!!!

Hayes-me-downs

My dear, sweet, precious friend Hayes is a children's fashionista. She has an eye for beautiful kid's clothes, and makes even more fabulous clothes than you could buy. And she generously gives them away when her girls are done. Luckily Laney is just a year younger than her youngest girl. We have been blessed by clothes from Hayes for years. Allen dubbed them "Hayes-me-downs" a long time ago. Just when I pack some up to give to our friend Kathy, some new ones appear at my doorstep, as they did today! Hayes' clothes are famous with my friends, and often Laney will get stalked because of her clothes! I just wanted to thank Hayes, who literally has a heart made of gold. I've never met anyone more giving and kind with their things. She has taught me a lot about giving, and inspired me to be a giver also. Thank you, Hayes!!!

The coffee cup

My dear friend Sandi. I'm waaay to emotional right now to tell you much about her, but let's just say she's one cool chick. She's the person I so want to be. Wise, steady, careful, practical, intelligent and thoughtful. We hit it off instantly, a while ago, and she's just precious to me.



She blogged one day, about her favorite coffee cup that she had broken. She was sad. See?

http://lifeasiseeit-sandi.blogspot.com/search/label/starbucks



I immediately went to Ebay, and looked for the sweet mug, but nothing.



So I searched. For the next 3 months. I let Jennifer in on the secret, and we searched together. And we bid on and lost on some auctions. I was more determined than ever.



Finally, such a happy, silly treat. It arrived. I was really excited. I love to do silly, goofy things for Sandi.



I got two mugs, actually. The green one below, in the post about Stella the mixer, is mine. I toyed with the idea of reselling it. I'm not a huge mug person, and drink tea out of my same old cups. But then I decided that my mug reminds me of my friends. It got real special, real fast...



This post isn't about me, believe it or not. It's about a sister in Christ that inspires these acts of love. You know what I mean? Someone who means so much to you that you want to do things to make them happy? And not in a weird stalkery way, either. In case you were wondering.



I feel this way about all my friends, but this mug just came to symbolize my friends that I met at a time in my life when you weren't supposed to make friends like this. These women have been there for me in times that I wouldn't have expected them to be. I have had more fun, and shed more tears over and with my friends, and I feel so incredibly blessed to have them in my life. So I do weird things like buy flats of geraniums or mugs off Ebay in really feeble attempts to thank them for being who they are. And for being in my life. So I love you dear friends. To my ones near and far. To my ones that I talk to 3 times a day and to my ones that I talk to once a month. I love you all dearly. Thank you for taking such good care of me.



Oh, and she'll kill me, but here is the happy picture...


Allen says we look alike in this picture. Hee!!!!! :)

Laney's Baptism

Oh, it was such a joy. I prayed from the time my babies were in the womb that they would accept Christ early in life, so they wouldn't waste any time living for Him. Laney really believed a long time ago. Actually a little too early for my comfort, but I just prayed that we would know when she was really ready. She was scared of water, and of going under, so we didn't push the issue of baptism. I more focused on what salvation really is in conversation with her. I didn't want her to make a profession of faith, and not really understand what that was. I just wanted her to wait until she was ready, but she was ready soon! That was an answer to prayer. It is so precious to see how real it is to her. How simple. "Of course Jesus died for me." It's so easy for her to believe.

I love how the Message Bible puts it. In Mark 10:16, Jesus said, "Mark this: Unless you accept God's kingdom in the simplicity of a child, you'll never get in." Sometimes I get so mired down in theology, my wants and needs in church and all that goes along with this "religion" that I lose sight of what the basis for it is. God loved us with such an incredible, unfathomable love, that He literally allowed His son to be killed so we could be with Him. I never want to forget the wonder of that. Or not believe it so simply and factually. To constantly and completely thank Him for that. To worship and love Him based on Who He is and what he did for me. And my daughter.

I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from our family and friends. Grown men wept, moms went and got their children so they could witness their friend make her demonstration of faith, and every one rejoiced. It was truly what a baptism should be. I was touched by how much it meant to everyone. One of my friends said Laney glowed, and she did. She said when she came up out of the water, she wanted to burst into tears. I really think she understood exactly what she was doing. The Spirit was with her sweet, five year old self.

I want her to do what Deuteronomy 11 says: "... to love the Lord your God and serve him with all our heart and with all your soul..." I know if she does that, her life is going to be blessed. As a mother, that's all I want.

Thank you all for being so sweet and loving and caring so much about our family. I have reflected so much on how much to all mean to me and to our family. We are blessed beyond measure.
The video is coming. We have had some technical difficulties, so bear with us. We'll get it here soon!!!

Jennifer's shower invitation

Well, I think they turned out great. Sandi was so awesome in getting these designed. We had a blast doing them, too!

Most importantly, I think Jennifer really liked them!!!

I'm sorry we couldn't make one for each of you. We hope that doesn't hurt your feelings. It was just a time issue for us!!!

We are so looking forward to a wonderful shower to celebrate this precious blessing and his mama!!!

(And a big "thank you" to Kathy, for reminding me we need to be careful with our blogs, and not put personal info out there. This is a private blog, but we still need to be careful, you know?)

A new addition to the family

Her name is Stella, and isn't she beautiful?? I love her!! lol

I've wanted a mixer for a long time, but just didn't do the cooking to justify it. Now that Zane is older, and I'm doing more baking and cooking from scratch, I felt the longing again.

I asked Jennifer about hers, and she said she had a new found love for hers. (now that her's didn't have anything to do with icing...!) So I thought I would ask Santa for one for Christmas.

I was cooking dinner one night, and Jennifer called me, all excited. James had found a mixer for, are you ready for this? - $75.00. They don't even go for that on Ebay. I said, "YES!" and Jennifer brought Stella home!

James rocks. He and I are such bargain hunters at heart! It's like a male version of me!! Ho, that is just so not true. We do love yard sales, though, and love a good bargain. So THANK YOU, James, for bring Stella to me!!!

I'm cracking myself up..... :) i would also like for you to notice that the compulsive type a freak in me wanted to clean up my counters before taking this picture, but in the vein of being real, i left the mess. i want you to be proud of me! I'm going to clean it right now, though!

and there is a story about that green monster coffee cup, and it's coming...

We'd never make it up North

These are my kids. Today. The temperature is 63 degrees. Crazy kids. They are back out there now, sans the gloves, hat and scarves. Thank goodness. Uh oh. Jude just came in to get his gloves. Geeze....

Now that Fall is really here, we could finally buy our favorite fall treat. It's like crack to us. I can feel Jennifer shuddering right now, but we could eat our weight in this stuff. Luckily it's not available but such a short time. And it MUST be Brach's. Not the icky imitation stufff. Ahhhh, fall. It means candy corn....

School is going amazingly well. I'm so thankful and blessed. My girl rocks. She talks about school in the shower, in the van, at the dinner table. She reads books to Jude. She wants to help more around the house. She has all but quit watching television. Homeschooling is the bomb. Sonlight is fabulous. We are so blessed. Wait, I already said that...

Laney working on a lapbook.

Zane saying, "Hold me." This is what he does during school. And I do.

This is what Jude does during school. He's playing with his cars!!! Bless his heart. He is learing though, see? He loves math. He answers questions before Laney does. He plays with Zane too. That's pretty cute. I'm glad Jude has Zane. I'm not sure what I'll do with Zane when Jude really starts, but His grace is enough...