Soaked in love and mercy

I heard a sermon on Sunday where the pastor used this phrase. 

I just sat there, thinking. 

I want to be that. Soaked. Dripping. Saturated. Oozing. Flowing with love and mercy.

Boy was I far from that this weekend. I was rude, judgmental, selfish and harsh.

*sigh* 

Do you ever get tired of running around the same old mountain? I am so tired of the areas in my life where I battle. I'm war weary.

We stay at home a lot. It's essential for all of our well being. When we're at home, I am quiet, reflective, prayerful, praising and peaceful. I measure, most of time, what I'm going to say and how I'm going to say it. 

But get me busy. Put me out in the world. I act just like the rest of the world.

Blech.

I can't live my life at home. I've got to become merciful and loving all the time. Not just when I'm not too busy. 

The sermon was about David. I love that my spiritual life runs in parallels. We're doing a study on the life of David, and so is a church we've visited. 

This really got me. Nathan, a prophet, came to Bathsheba. The last time they met, was 30 years prior when Nathan judged her sin with David. He came this time to help her and her son-David's son, to get him on he throne. Nathan showed love and mercy. He put past him exactly that-the past.

Solomon was Bathsheba and David's son too. According to this pastor, Solomon was the viable and visible sign of God's mercy. They lost their first son, as a consequence to sin. Their second son took the throne in his father's place. That's a big jump. God is merciful and quick to forgive. And full of love.

It's trite to say that God is soaked in love and mercy. He is love and mercy so much so that He sacrificed His baby boy. 

I am desperate to be this. Soaked in love and mercy. Gentle. Patient. Understanding. NOT judgmental. Not prideful. And busy. Outside my four walls. Pray for me, please. I really want to get there...