This is one of those, "feel free to ignore" posts. It's really just for me. :)
Zane is officially 3 1/2 now. I can't say things are easy, but I can say that they are easie-R. I can also say that I can look back now, and, with some degree of separation, see why God gave him to me. I don't think I'm quiet ready to put all the reasons down, but I do think I can summarize them by saying that I am at my best when I think I'm at my worst. I seem to create destruction when I'm at my "best." I'm also trying to see how God is going to use me without keeping me beat down. Or maybe He is.
Didn't mean to William Faulkner there. Back to the point...
Zane. Oh yes. I'm starting to see some of the big kid come out in him. It's been fascinating. And reassuring. I see qualities in him that God is going to use in a very mighty way. I'm praying that I'm the mother that he needs me to be. And that He needs me to be.
So on a lighter note, he has been hilarious the last few days, and I just wanted to get these down before they are gone forever.
We were at the McWane center yesterday, and we were hanging out at the shark/sting ray touch tank. One of the sharks, a barracuda shark, I think, was asleep on the bottom of the tank. The nice McWane lady was telling us that they are nocturnal, which made sense to all of us but Zane, and I didn't think to explain it to him. He studied it for a minute, then looked at me and said, "Do they (the McWane center) have him turned off?"
Um, yeah. They do...
This morning we were watching "Monster Jam" and Zane was crawling all over me. I told him that Daddy used to called him "Monster Truck" because Zane just rolls over and knocks down everything in his path: people and objects alike. He grinned and looked at me and said, "Except I don't have wheels."
I can see his critical thinking skill wheels start to turn... ;)
And the last one.
All of my kids have been especially interested in human death here lately. I can't find a reason why-nothing in school precipitated it, nothing in church, and nothing we've really talked about. The older two and I have had numerous conversations about death, heaven and being with Jesus, and I guess Zane has been listening, and processing.
So last night, just after he gets into bed, we have this conversation:
Zane: Mom, where is Heaven?
Me: Up in the sky.
Z: Why do we go there?
Me: Because you love Jesus in your heart. When you die, you go to sleep on earth and wake up in heaven.
Z: But you said we don't sleep in heaven. (This was a conversation in regards to Jude's numerous questions about heaven, one of which was "Do we sleep in heaven?" to which I answered, "No.")
Me: Okay, well, you don't sleep in heaven. You go to sleep here and WAKE UP in heaven.
Z: (he's not done yet) So how do we get to heaven.
Me: (It's late and I'm tired) We fly.
Z: But we can't fly.
Me: (Sensing that I'm going not going to get out of this one easily) Yes, well, our insides fly. You know, like our heart-our spirit. (Holding my breath and wondering how to explain this further to a 3 year old.)
Zane studies me for a minute, and I'm waiting, trying desperately to formulate the answer to the next question he might ask. Then he sits up straighter in the bed and announces:
"Wolverine can't fly either. He just has to poke people..."
Zane got some random Wolverine figure in a bag of toys from the thrift store, and Allen told him what Wolverine's name was. And you can certainly see why Wolverine has to "poke people." As to his inability to fly, I'll have to trust Zane on that one since I have no idea. I do reckon that having those razor thingies would make it hard to fly, never mind trying to brush your teeth. I guess super heroes don't have to brush their teeth, but it seems like I've William Faulknered again.
I am ever so thankful for Zane, and more thankful for what God has taught me through him. I think last week, as I reflected back on some really hard times, I admitted to myself that there were times with him that I really didn't think I could do it. That speaks so much of God's grace and strength that He so freely gives.
Zane is officially 3 1/2 now. I can't say things are easy, but I can say that they are easie-R. I can also say that I can look back now, and, with some degree of separation, see why God gave him to me. I don't think I'm quiet ready to put all the reasons down, but I do think I can summarize them by saying that I am at my best when I think I'm at my worst. I seem to create destruction when I'm at my "best." I'm also trying to see how God is going to use me without keeping me beat down. Or maybe He is.
Didn't mean to William Faulkner there. Back to the point...
Zane. Oh yes. I'm starting to see some of the big kid come out in him. It's been fascinating. And reassuring. I see qualities in him that God is going to use in a very mighty way. I'm praying that I'm the mother that he needs me to be. And that He needs me to be.
So on a lighter note, he has been hilarious the last few days, and I just wanted to get these down before they are gone forever.
We were at the McWane center yesterday, and we were hanging out at the shark/sting ray touch tank. One of the sharks, a barracuda shark, I think, was asleep on the bottom of the tank. The nice McWane lady was telling us that they are nocturnal, which made sense to all of us but Zane, and I didn't think to explain it to him. He studied it for a minute, then looked at me and said, "Do they (the McWane center) have him turned off?"
Um, yeah. They do...
This morning we were watching "Monster Jam" and Zane was crawling all over me. I told him that Daddy used to called him "Monster Truck" because Zane just rolls over and knocks down everything in his path: people and objects alike. He grinned and looked at me and said, "Except I don't have wheels."
I can see his critical thinking skill wheels start to turn... ;)
And the last one.
All of my kids have been especially interested in human death here lately. I can't find a reason why-nothing in school precipitated it, nothing in church, and nothing we've really talked about. The older two and I have had numerous conversations about death, heaven and being with Jesus, and I guess Zane has been listening, and processing.
So last night, just after he gets into bed, we have this conversation:
Zane: Mom, where is Heaven?
Me: Up in the sky.
Z: Why do we go there?
Me: Because you love Jesus in your heart. When you die, you go to sleep on earth and wake up in heaven.
Z: But you said we don't sleep in heaven. (This was a conversation in regards to Jude's numerous questions about heaven, one of which was "Do we sleep in heaven?" to which I answered, "No.")
Me: Okay, well, you don't sleep in heaven. You go to sleep here and WAKE UP in heaven.
Z: (he's not done yet) So how do we get to heaven.
Me: (It's late and I'm tired) We fly.
Z: But we can't fly.
Me: (Sensing that I'm going not going to get out of this one easily) Yes, well, our insides fly. You know, like our heart-our spirit. (Holding my breath and wondering how to explain this further to a 3 year old.)
Zane studies me for a minute, and I'm waiting, trying desperately to formulate the answer to the next question he might ask. Then he sits up straighter in the bed and announces:
"Wolverine can't fly either. He just has to poke people..."
Zane got some random Wolverine figure in a bag of toys from the thrift store, and Allen told him what Wolverine's name was. And you can certainly see why Wolverine has to "poke people." As to his inability to fly, I'll have to trust Zane on that one since I have no idea. I do reckon that having those razor thingies would make it hard to fly, never mind trying to brush your teeth. I guess super heroes don't have to brush their teeth, but it seems like I've William Faulknered again.
I am ever so thankful for Zane, and more thankful for what God has taught me through him. I think last week, as I reflected back on some really hard times, I admitted to myself that there were times with him that I really didn't think I could do it. That speaks so much of God's grace and strength that He so freely gives.
3 comments:
i enjoy your blog so very much. thank you for sharing.
I feel you as I sit here WAY too early holding 'my Zane' (aka Carson).
Sweet, funny Zane. I wish you could write Cody stories for me!
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