Since I have Facebook on the brain, I'm extending my status updates to my life updates. No, not life updates. This is just how my brain is working today:
Amy is...
Listening to one song over and over again all day long. And pondering the meaning of it. And letting the music take me back to days in my life when I got to go see live music, which is where part of my soul still rests. I need music, and I need a certain amount of live music. I love to get lost in it, feel it swirl around me. I find myself needing more and more to get back to the essense of me. Get back to the parts of me that have been pushed aside for so, so long. And I desperately want a voice that would let me be a back up singer. My dream, absolute dream job.
Killing herself cleaning this house, and honestly mad at God that He's calling me to a higher level here. ME-one of the few people I know that actually *like* to clean house, being pushed harder in this area of my life. What the heck?
Pondering theology. Restless and bucking against the time restraints on my study time. Wondering how in the world I've missed some basic, fundamental tenants of my belief system. Wondering why in the world God puts up with me.
Pondering this quote by one of my favorite authors, Ernest Hemmingway, from "A Farewell to Arms:"
"The world breaks everyone, and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry."
So excited about this new Beth Moore study. I've prayed blessings over her all day, after watching the introductory video last night. I've missed having Beth in my life, and I'm so blessed and amazed by her. I'm super excited about this study, and thinking about what I've learned so far.
Danced while making dinner. It felt good. I danced while I cleaned the bathroom too. I've danced as much as possible today. I miss dancing too...
Actually fantasized about running today. Granted I was cleaning the shower, which is the job I so vehemently despise as far as housework goes, but still. I felt the stress of the day, of my life, and I just wanted to throw down that scrubbie, tear off the yellow rubber gloves and go run and run and run. I still do...
Praying for the sick, the hurt, the needy and all the people that keep ringing in my head that need God so desperately right now.
Is fully aware that she had not finished the Psalm 23 homework. *sigh*
Is trepidatous about finalizing the joining process for church on Sunday. It's just because I'm a freak.
Is super emotional right now, and ready to be done with that.
Has no desire in the whole world to watch television tonight. I just want to exercise and study. My goodness, I think God just may have done a work here...
Super proud of how hard her kids worked today. Over and beyond what I even knew they were capable of. I'm so proud, especially since they cleaned up messes THEY made...
There. I feel a little better. Why in the world that blogging helps calm my brain down, I'll never know...
Amy is...
Listening to one song over and over again all day long. And pondering the meaning of it. And letting the music take me back to days in my life when I got to go see live music, which is where part of my soul still rests. I need music, and I need a certain amount of live music. I love to get lost in it, feel it swirl around me. I find myself needing more and more to get back to the essense of me. Get back to the parts of me that have been pushed aside for so, so long. And I desperately want a voice that would let me be a back up singer. My dream, absolute dream job.
Killing herself cleaning this house, and honestly mad at God that He's calling me to a higher level here. ME-one of the few people I know that actually *like* to clean house, being pushed harder in this area of my life. What the heck?
Pondering theology. Restless and bucking against the time restraints on my study time. Wondering how in the world I've missed some basic, fundamental tenants of my belief system. Wondering why in the world God puts up with me.
Pondering this quote by one of my favorite authors, Ernest Hemmingway, from "A Farewell to Arms:"
"The world breaks everyone, and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry."
So excited about this new Beth Moore study. I've prayed blessings over her all day, after watching the introductory video last night. I've missed having Beth in my life, and I'm so blessed and amazed by her. I'm super excited about this study, and thinking about what I've learned so far.
Danced while making dinner. It felt good. I danced while I cleaned the bathroom too. I've danced as much as possible today. I miss dancing too...
Actually fantasized about running today. Granted I was cleaning the shower, which is the job I so vehemently despise as far as housework goes, but still. I felt the stress of the day, of my life, and I just wanted to throw down that scrubbie, tear off the yellow rubber gloves and go run and run and run. I still do...
Praying for the sick, the hurt, the needy and all the people that keep ringing in my head that need God so desperately right now.
Is fully aware that she had not finished the Psalm 23 homework. *sigh*
Is trepidatous about finalizing the joining process for church on Sunday. It's just because I'm a freak.
Is super emotional right now, and ready to be done with that.
Has no desire in the whole world to watch television tonight. I just want to exercise and study. My goodness, I think God just may have done a work here...
Super proud of how hard her kids worked today. Over and beyond what I even knew they were capable of. I'm so proud, especially since they cleaned up messes THEY made...
There. I feel a little better. Why in the world that blogging helps calm my brain down, I'll never know...
5 comments:
Shannon is so glad to have reconnected with such an amazing friend. :)
I love your post. Write a book...I'd buy it! :) Love you!
Ronda is happy to know that she isn't alone with so many different thoughts going through her head! What Beth Moore Study are you doing?"
you left out...
"amazingly wonderful and very loved."
That made me tired, sad, happy and encouraged all at once. You are amazing, and are you sure you're not meant to be a writer--maybe a backup singer-songwriter.
That made me tired, sad, happy and encouraged all at once. You are amazing, and are you sure you're not meant to be a writer--maybe a backup singer-songwriter.
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